should be obscene and not heard."
"Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is
"My classmates would copulate with anything that moved,
but I never saw any reason to limit myself."
"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until
you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a
middle aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life."
Father had a profound influence on me, he was a lunatic."
"Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better
class of enemy."
"Men are simple things. They can survive a whole weekend
with only three things: beer, boxer shorts and batteries for the
"A lecture is a process by which the notes of the professor
become the notes of the students without passing through the minds
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think
of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself."
mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip
out a man's genitals through his wallet."
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find
a woman I don't like and just give her a house."